In his book, Gehrisch tries to do two things at once. Half of the chapters are dedicated to the “heart” mentioned in the title, as he offers the readers advice which will lead to a long-term, fulfilling relationship. The other half is dedicated to the “golf pro”: Gehrisch himself. He has played in several tournaments, and he alternates the advice chapters with stories from the courses. (Some of those wind up having advice as well; the man can’t help himself.)

Being a layperson when it comes to golf—the extent of my knowledge comes from family putt-putt outings—some of the stories in the golf chapters went over my head. Mostly, though, they were told in an engaging, easily accessible style. Gehrisch knows how to tell a good story, and he isn’t afraid of poking a little fun at himself, which makes it easier to laugh along with his humor. These were the most engaging part of the book.

The romantic advice was much more hit or miss. Some of his rules for a fulfilling relationship are good advice, even if they seem rather obvious. (If they really were obvious, though, perhaps we would see more long-term relationships in the world.) He discusses the need to listen to your partner and meet them where they are rather than expecting them to meet you where you are, and he gets into the idea of marrying your best friend. The longer the book went on, though, the more skeptical I became.

Though he says at the beginning that the rules apply equally to heterosexual or same-sex couples, it’s very clear he primarily had heterosexual couples in mind when writing the book. Every example he gives refers to a couple made up of a man and a woman. Additionally, he often relies on old-fashioned gender norms when discussing how a man and a woman ought to interact. He acknowledges that the world is changing and that many women are in the workplace and can be the breadwinners of the family, but when it comes to romance, in his mind, men are still the pursuers and women must be warmed up to the idea of intimacy.

I would have more faith in his ideas if he provided some sources for some of the statistics he throws around (80% of women are Givers and 20% of men are Takers, for instance), but it seems there’s nothing backing those up but his own observations and opinions.